Saturday, April 28, 2007

and now for some deep thoughts!

So I was thinking about friendship today. These are not revolutionary thoughts, but I just wanted to reflect a bit. I was thinking about this topic because these past several months have been all about creating new friendships and holding onto old ones.

I'm realizing that a really good friendship exists when both people know fully well of the other's flaws. Then you're like cool, well this person is still worth it. I mean yeah he's kind of a dick sometimes and yeah she can sometimes be really selfish but yeah, they're solid friends so I'm going to accept them for who they are and they will do the same for me. When you're in this whole making new friends process, it can be really sucky to suddenly realize someone's weaknesses. Damn. This person isn't as cool as I thought she was. But really, she is. You are just becoming better friends.

Then there's the old friends from the homeland. Strangely, I've stayed in better touch with some of them while I've been here than when I'm at school in Missouri. Maybe it's because we are so worried about loosing our friendship. But weirdly, I feel closer to some of them than I did at home. I also know we could have picked up where we left off as soon as I hit US soil. We'd still be friends. But then we would loose months of knowing about each other's lives. So I'm glad this is how it is.

yah, I'm content.

Monday, April 23, 2007


Today we were watching a chinese soap opera in culture et mondialisation which I intended to find hysterical, but the intro displayed scenes from new york. I saw the world trade center, and seeing that really hurt, for some reason a lot more than any other time. I never understood it and didn't really try to. And just now virginia tech happened and my first instinct was to not read anything about it, not ask any questions because I didn't want to know. I just blocked it out. The metro ride home I started thinking about it, how immature of me it was of me try to make sense of these things by not thinking about them. What is wrong with feeling? Why do I hide from it?

i hate titles. hate. hate. hate.

As I am loving France more and more and am so sad to be leaving a month from now, I am missing what I've got waiting for me back home. I wouldn't rather be one place or the other. I want to be in both places. I'm getting more and more excited for this summer while becoming less and less excited about leaving. huh. does that make sense? I'm missing hoochfest too. Tears.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Plus 81

I went to the coolest venue last night and saw the coolest band and am generally stoked about life. Now I have to buy a ticket home and that will probably make me cry.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

the stuff that memories are made of

Last night was quite possibly my most superbly favorite of those out on the town. It was an Adam reunion of sorts, minus 25% (we were so sad).

I feel that recounting all the stories would be boring as you were not there, so I will just give you a little hint of the greatness that was last night.

- whoever can dance with the most skankalicious girl wins. her bisexual boyfriends were down
- breaking it down the the crappiest american music ever
- french guy who pretended to be australian to try to get in girls pants
- body shots
- man i never spoke to once who randomly gave me his credit card to buy myself a drink so I picked the most expensive thing on the menu and bought one for myself and four of my friends
- sniffing girls' hair
- girl with poop in her pants
- biting it when I tried to put Ben on my back
- and of course how could it a night with the Adam crew if we didn't continue the never ending discussion on butt sex

Monday, April 16, 2007

i love my friends

love em. I want you to know. If you are my friend I love you. I really expected a lot of my friendships to slip right through the cracks and that on return to the states I would try to salvage what was leftover. But that's not necessaire because my friends are sooooo coooool.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

high come down

dear five people I know who read my blog and the 38 I do not know:

I have been worried sick about you for the past two weeks. I have been adventuring all over europe and you had no idea. You really must know about all the things I have done. But I am not a dedicated enough blogger to post in the midst of traveling, and so I thought I would just fill you in when I got back.

One of my last days in Barcelona, a huge wave of homesickness smashed me hard. I was frustrated with my horrible map skills and my limited "hola. gracias." vocabulary. The unfamiliarness of it all was wearing me down. All I could think about was every good memory I have of my friends from Chicago and Columbia, I am missing the dumbest stupidest shit like bickering with John why he doesn't give blockbuster money and fine I will pay $4.99 for this movie. I wanted to go home.

Then last night, I am exhaustedly riding the escalator in a Marseille metro station, I am sick of living out of my backpack and I am tired and over the past 14 days I have slept in more beds than I have taken showers. I look above me and glance at the french advertisement above me and a few seconds later it registers that I completely comprehend everything the ad said. And heya I realize that I feel like I am home.

I will fill you in on my travels later because I am going to go bask in the glory that is france and maybe while I am reading "Qui Suive Peut" in the Parc, I will eavesdrop on the conversation next to me and bask in feeling like I belong.